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March 14, 2012     Coquille Valley Sentinel
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March 14, 2012 The Sentinel Page 7 taken from ODD CUSTOMERS by the odd German restaurant guy GERMANY ABOVE ALL? It's about 3:30 P I during my two hour between-meals shift, and the place is empty. Even though we are doing well this sum- mer, people are not wandering in all afternoon and late at night, as they have done in past tourist seasons. Then the doorbell announces the arrival of a motorcycle rider, all clad in black leather. He is a fellow in his mid- thirties, with all the attributes that used to make proponents of Prussian supremacy drool: well- built, with close-cropped blond hair, light blue eyes and slightly raised cheekbones. As a matter of fact, the Aryan racial hypothe- sis doesn't seem far from the truth: "Sprechen Sie noch Deutsch bier?" "Doch, das ist mir aber heutzultage nicbt mehr so gelaufig. " "Sure, but I'm not as fluent as I used to be." It's my favorite trick when a show-off spouts German to the wait- er; it's guaranteed to silence those whose repertoire does not extend beyond "Sprekken See Doyts?". But this fellow under- stands me, and he is happy to learn that I studied German in school, just like everyone else in Holland. I even had a girl friend in Frankfurt once. But even though his German is quite good, I detect a certain hesitancy. Then he explains that he is from the Ukraine, but of German background. Do we have seafood? I assure him that we do, and soon a second biker joins him. This one seems to have neither German nor English, so they con- verse in the Ukraine language, which to my ear sounds a bit softer than Russian. The German speaker has never had clam chowder, and he wonders if it is any good. Ours is the best, I assure him, and it comes with a guarantee, so they order two bowls, and a garlic-scampi dinner to share. When I return with the chowder they have discovered that we serve English hard cider, and ask for two pints. Soon I only have to show my face to see additional items ordered. First a bratwurst appetizer. Then a salmon dinner for the silent friend. Two more pints of cider. After those come oyster shooters, which turn out to be the only new food experi- ence my German-Ukrainian customer does not care for; neither horseradish nor cocktail sauce can change his attitude. I mention that some people make raw oysters palatable by drowning them in vodka, which finds a ready response but still doesn't do the trick. More cider follows. Throughout, the Aryan spokesman expresses his satisfaction at finding an American establishment that serves palatable food. Evidently, since they climbed on their Harleys they have found nothing but fried junk along the road, and they are sick of it; not an uncommon com- plaint of travelers in these parts. They also praise my judgment in serving hard cider. Because they are headed for San Francisco, I assure them they will fred that city full of good food and drink but that, unfortunately, to the average American "seafood" means deep-fried stuff. It's part of the brick-in-the-stomach nutrition cul- ture that's turning into a national millstone. I've always had a soft spot for people from Eastern Europe; history has been so hard on so many generations. In 1944 Polish troops under Allied com- mand liberated my home town in the southern etherlands; the casualties they took were really for Poland, but they didn't know that Churchill had already abandoned their country to Josef Stalin. Roosevelt, that jaunty windbag, had no qualms about such territorialgi)iways to his ally "Uncle Joe", a mass-murderer withttlr/hivance World War II would not have started in the first place. My IJiI 6yster farmer Lilli Clausen was a Volksdentsche Who came from the Ukraine as a child; as part of the 1939 Hitler-Stalin pact her family had been repatriated to the fatherland. Or at least they had made it to that part of recently-conquered Poland that Hitler had incorporated in the Vaterland, where they were given the property of a recently dispossessed Polish family. As students of World War II know, a couple of years later Hitler attacked his erstwhile ally Stalin, and after a successful counteroffensive a vengeful Stalin moved all the borders westward, chasing away millions of Germans, including Lilli and her family. Now in her seventies, Lilli has done well with her oysters; yet she still speaks wistfully of all they lost in those dictator-orchestrated mass- upheavals. Tragically for Lilli, and ironically for Hitler, in the end he merely achieved" ... the reversal of the momentum of the once- mighty German colonization drive eastward from the Elbe. It had begun deep in the Middle Ages; had led, indeed, to the founding of Berlin around A.D. 1230. This Drang nacbt dem Osten, less a conquest than a colonization, meant to Germans what the winning of the West means to Americans. Adolf Hitler, the Austrian who had so glibly preached a Thousand Year Reich, had, in fact, destroyed the honest work and labor of seven centuries of German pioneers and colonizers.?') When my two guests are about done I ask the spokesman if he'd mind checking my translation of a 1921 Soviet poster in the other room. Ifs in Russian, and he confirms that it calls on the people to turn in their weapons. Actually, I have it on display (along with a World War II German poster promising the death penalty for Dutchmen who possess firearms) became it makes an excellent argument for our Second Amendment. The people of the kraine suffered from that most terrible combination of handicaps: a murderous, tyrannical government, and no weapons to defend themselves. The Stalin-engineered famine of 1933 killed millions of Ukrainians, including children eaten by their parents. Sure enough, ' I ask my German-speaking Ukrainian how his relatives fared during massacre by starvation, I touch a nerve. "The only reason my two grandfathers survived," he explains, "was the fact that they had bees. Knowing that Stalin's soldiers would come, they had hidden their hives and their honey in the woods." "Did the soldiers come and take all their other food?" Yes; and the troops knew that the people had buried some of thier supplies. So they probed the ground with sticks. Besides tak- ing all edibles, they seized anything else of value. "There was a baby in the home," he adds, "and they yanked the pillow from under the baby's head." Ah, what a boon Marxism has been to mankind. To each according to his needs ... I'm sure Uncle Joe's soldiers had been properly indoctrinated with the idea that social progress occurs thro re-distribution of property, if need be at the point of a gun. To make that great Utopian omelet you may need to break a few eggs, in this case the killing of an obstinate social class: the peasants of the Ukraine. When I mention the forced wanderings of Lilli my oyster farmer, my guest explains that after Hitler's 1941 attack on the USSR ethnic Germans from eastern Ukraine were deported to Kazakhstan. After Perestroika they were allowed to return. And apparently, throwing off their collectivist shackles has done won- ders for them. My guest is an engineer by trade, obviously pros- perous, and he visits the United States several times a year on business. For future occasions he plans to leave his Harley at the home of a sister who lives in the Midwest. He has worked on projects in today's Germany as well. But re-discovering ancient roots inspired him with pessimism. For a nation to maintair itself, people have to have national pride. But the Hitler era has given Germans such a massive moral hangover that they frown on any kind of patriotic feeling. While he approves of brash American patriotism, he despairs of the long-term survival of Germany. He also shows his command of American slang: "The Germans nowadays," he tells me twice, "are wusses." Their bill comes to about eighty-five dollars. When I bring him the credit card slip he instructs me to add a tip sufficient to make the total $150. His name is Taras; we part like old friends. Let us honor our Founding Fathers for the 2nd Amendment No matter how poorly they worded it After the Russian revolution of1917 abolished the Czarist rgime, the communists forcibly overthrew the provisional gov- ernment, abolished the assembly, and killed the Czar and his fam- ily. From then through 1921 a civil war raged between the com- peting groups, costing between 2 and 3 million lives. In the end the communists won that war, mainly because they occupied Moscow, the center of railroads and other communications. Then they issued this call to surrender weapons. Next, between 1921 and 1989 the Soviet-Russian government killed an estimated 61 million-of- own citizens (not counting 20 million who died in wars). Of the 61 million, the largest share (40 million) perished in the Gulag slave-labor camps in the arctic north where they froze, starved, and were worked to death. Another 8 or 9 million died in "purges'" like Stalin's pre-world War 11show-trials of anyone suspected of disloyalty. 8 million more starved because of the 1932-33food confiscations in the Ukraine, part of Stalin's campaign to collectivize farming. Another 4 or 5 million died during and because of mass-deporta- tions of population groups such as Volga-Germans, Lithuanians, Poles, and many others. The original poster is from occupied Holland during World War 11. In German and in Dutch, it says: WARNING I have cause to point out emphatically that any and all firearms, ammunition, hand grenades, explosives and other war matdriel must be turned in. Lately German war tribunals have had to pronounce convictions on account of prohibited ownership of such objects. I draw attention to the fact that for such offenses the heaviest punishments up to and including the death penalty will be applied, and that in the future no clemency can be expected. The Wehrmacht commander in the Netherlands - Signed Gen. Friedrich Christiansen. Some of Wim de Vriend's columns on this page will be excerpts from his book "Odd Customers". Written in a humorous style that makes it an easy read, "Odd Customers" is a mix of funny stories from his restaurant and reflections on history. Other columns will be based on his latest book "The JOB Messiahs - how govern- ment destroys our prosperity and our freedoms to create jobs." Although much longer than "Odd Customers", "The JOB Messiahs" is also written in an entertaining style. JOB Messiahs, Wire explains, are people like those working for the Port of Coos Bay, Fonsi, SCDC and other "economic development" agencies who act like saviors. JOB Messiahs pretend to create jobs, but the only ones they care about are their own. His book documents their debacles during the last thirty-five years. With hundreds of historical photographs and thousands of footnotes, it is a complete account of the failures of the Port of Coos Bay. Its conclusion is that "eco- nomic development" schemes don't work, and worse: that in Coos County they have been counterproductive, making our area the only part of western Oregon whose economy has declined in recent decades.., all thanks to the JOB Messiahs. "Odd Customers" and "The JOB Messiahs" are available for sale at the office of The Sentinel in Coquille, at the Blue Heron restaurant in Coos Bay, and at Books-by-the-Bay in North Bend. "Odd Customers" retails for $14.95, and "The JOB Messiahs" for $29. Needless to say, both are worth a great deal more. Three High School Artists Earn Tuition Waivers at SWOCC More than 100 high school students with a penchant for the visual arts came from all over the college district and beyond, for a special day hosted by the Southwestern Oregon Community College Foundation (SWOCC) and the Coos Art Museum. It start- ed with lunch at the Oregon Coast Culinary Institute and included a culinary demonstration of Beignet, a French pastry that is pre- pared with a flamb of pineapple and rum. After lunch the SWOCC Student Ambassadors escorted the students to the music and art departments, college residential housing and the recreation center. The students traveled on to the Coos Art Museum where James Fritz, Art Instructor from SWOCC recognized the winners of the "Visions" art competi- tion. The top three winners, were given two-year tuition waivers at the college as well as a cash award of $250, $200 and $75. Their work will become part of the permanent collection at the college. The student art work will be on display at the Coos Art Museum from March 2 -April 21, 2012. Taylor Smith of Bandon High School was awarded Best of Show with a silk painting entitled "Within a Dream." Jaelee Lamar of Brookings Harbor High School won the First of Show with a mixed media painting called "Lucid Ambiguity." Jake Buffington of Gold Beach High School was awarded second in show with a ceramic piece entitled "Maxuim." Average retail gasoline prices in Oregon have risen 2.0 cents per gallon in the past week, averaging $3.97/g yes- terday. This compares with the national average that has increased 3.8 cents per gallon in the last week to $3.75/g, according to gasoline price website OregonGasPrices.com. Including the change in gas prices in Oregon during the past week, prices yes- terday were 34.5 cents per gallon higher than the same day one year ago and are 46.5 cents per gallon higher than a month ago. The national average has increased 28.3 cents per gallon during the last month and stands 22.4 cents per gallon higher than this day one year ago. "With a likely peak in gasoline prices still as much as two or more months away, the national average for a gal- lon of gasoline has already hit the bottom of the range that we projected back in January in our 2012 gasoline price forecast, which is quite concerning," said GasBuddy.eom Senior Petroleum Analyst Patrick DeHaan. "While the recent pace of price increases has slowed somewhat, the spotlight will now shift to refining facilities as they start and finish maintenance- any unexpected problems arising from such may cause prices to resume a quick climb," DeHaan said. Big game raffle tickets on sale until May 7: 2011 winner bagged trophy elk for under $50 in tickets Elgin resident Chad Thompson bought just 15 2011 elk raffle tags, spending under $50--but won a three-month long hunting season, a privilege some pay thousands for at auction. Thompson ended up bagging a trophy animal on public land (Wenaha . Wildlife Area), an elk that green scored over 400". "It was the first time I had bought raffle tickets," said Thompson. "I got the 15 ticket package, sent them off and forgot about them. I was pretty surprised when I won." Thompson hunted nearly every day after getting off work starting on Sept. 1, 2011 and took his bull just before dark on Sept. 24 on Eden Bench, near Troy, where he knew the animal frequented based on previous scouting trips. Eden Bench is within the Wenaha Wildlife Area, a 13,000-acre wildlife area managed by ODFW. "It was a good deal," said Thompson. "I'm pretty sure I'll buy more tickets for this year." Raffle tickets for 2012 big game hunts (deer, elk, Rocky Mr. goat, pronghorn antelope, bighorn sheep) will be on sale until May 7. Raffle tickets can also be given as a gift to someone else. Prices range from $4.50 for one deer hunt raffle ticket to $11.50 for one bighorn sheep, Rocky Mt. goat or pronghorn ante- lope hunt raffle ticket. Multiple ticket packages are available with a per-ticket price discount. See the mail order form at OregonRaffieHunts.com or page 22-23 of the 2012 Oregon Big Game Regulations for a full breakdown of prices and an order form. Buy tickets online or by mail or fax order no later than May 7, 2012. Mail and fax orders must be received (not just poslmarked or fax dated) by May 7. Completed tickets must be received by 5 p.m. Thursday, May 17 (mail to ODFW Raffles, PO Box 7760, Salem OR 97303 or hand-deliver to ODFW Headquarters, 3406 Cherry Ave NE, Salem). Winning tickets will be drawn at the Oregon Hunters Association Convention at the Deschutes County Fairgrounds (Redmond) on Saturday, May 19. Raffle tickets can also be pur- chased from 5-7 p.m. at the event, and completed tickets hand- delivered from 5-7:30 pm. The drawing will be held at 7:45 p.m. Track raffle ticket sales at the following website, which is updated weekly http://www.dfw, state.or.us/resources/hunting/auctions_raf- fles/current_rafflecounts.asp NEW LISTING OrdU00lY21o Dan Wooldrid =e Broker Cell 541.297-4877 Fax 541-396-3532 Best Realty 55 E. 1st Coquille, OR 97423 2 bed/2 bath fully ADA accessible 1370 sq ff 1 story home, built in 2001 on large .47 acre lot, with 2 car garage + carport + fenced back yard + and 10X20 outbuilding/shop with work benches. Large covered rear deck. Call today! Dan Wooldddge danw@century21.com "2011 Award: Century 21 Northwest top 100 agents, ranked #50 for AGC/#45 for Units sold "2011 Award: Century 21 Northwest, largest single sale "2011 Award: Century 21 Top Gross closed in Coquille Office "2011 Award: Century 21 Corporate Master Emerald Award :' /